A Sneak Peek from my Amazon Best Selling Spicy Motorcycle Romance- Beneath the Helmet

-Slow Burn

-Childhood Best Friends to Lovers

-Love Triangle

-Coming of Age

-Protective but Sweet MMC

Eighteen-year-old Charlotte Windsor has never had a boyfriend, let alone a kiss. But when she's shown a video of the viral, anonymous dancing biker who's taken the entire school by storm, it opens her mind to the possibilities of what she's been missing out on.

His shirtless videos and the fantasies they've created, have her completely obsessed.

Who is this guy?

Where does he go to school?

What does he look like under that helmet?

She never expected her obsession would launch her into newfound confidence, drawing in the attention of the all-star track athlete and emotional whiplash she could swear was jealousy from her best friend, Ben.

Now in a situation she's unsure of how to handle, there's one more curveball that's about to be thrown her way: The faceless biker she's been obsessed with has been secretly loving her from the shadows, calculating when he'll make his move.  

Chapter Seven.

The next day at school is rough. A stark horniness sets me on edge, distracting me all day. All of this is so new to me. Am I really going to have to start masturbating every day to feel normal? That would definitely hurt my ability to be a socially acceptable, functioning human being. 

Each time I get called on ends with a frustrated glance from the teachers. I’m completely checked out, the only focus possible being on those videos of the biker boy waiting for me at home.

Today’s outfit choice is a blue and white spotted dress to see if I can get another reaction from Ben. Unintentionally, it brings the attention of Jared once more, causing us to replay our walk down the hallway and him putting his arm over me every chance he gets.

Ben’s facial reactions upon seeing Jared and I together, or when just seeing me in general, get more obvious.

Anger. Jealousy. Hurt.

They all flash on his face in that order. By the end of the day, he looks like he’s going to punch something or someone.

I don’t know why he’s getting so worked up. I’ve seen him and Tree together like this tons of times and I didn’t freak out…well not outwardly. I keep myself in check even if it hurts or angers me at times. He’s acting like I’m committing the biggest act of betrayal by hanging around Jared. We’re all just friends so I don’t see the big deal or why anyone has to make drama out of this.

Hopefully we can sort this out before Ben’s graduation party. If not, maybe I’ll pull him aside and talk to him at his party either before or after everyone leaves. I don’t want our friendship to end over a stupid argument over nothing.

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Jared walks me out to my car again at the end of the day. I scan the parking lot for Ben, but he’s nowhere to be seen. Jared gives me a big hug with a tight squeeze around my mid-section, pulling me fully into his chest and letting his cologne wrap around me.

Maybe I should explore this with Jared. He’s putting in the effort lately, and I’ll admit, I like it. Plus, he’s not bad to look at either. I’ve always noticed how in shape he was but never thought anything of it. He’s not a thicker, muscular build like Ben, but a lean cut, built for running with legs clearly displaying the power contained within them. I mean, the guy’s calf muscles pop out with every step he takes.

He holds me for a second longer than he needs to, continuing to smile down at me. I return one back, getting in my car and he shuts the door for me like a gentleman.

“See you tomorrow, Charlotte.”

Rolling down my window, I reply, “Yeah, for sure. Isn’t it nuts? That this is all over? That we’ll officially be done with high school?”

He leans over the open window, folding his arms and resting his chin on them in a relaxed manner.

“It really is. This last year was way more stressful compared to the previous three. Too bad everything is ending right when it was getting good.”

“What do you mean? You’ve got this amazing scholarship for track and will be venturing out into the real world. You’re nothing like me. I barely scraped into college, and I’ve never done anything special to be remembered for. I have a feeling my adulthood is going to be just as average as my adolescence.”

I end the statement discouraged, looking down into my hands lying in my lap, twiddling with the folds of my dress. These thoughts have lingered in me for a while, but I haven’t yet had the courage to have this conversation with Ben or my parents. I’m surprised I was able to be this vulnerable with Jared.

His knuckle grazes my chin as he tilts my head up. He lifts his head off his arms, eyes boring deep into mine. Wow, I never noticed the multitude of gold specks in between the bright green of his irises. The colors blend to create a beautiful combination.

“You are anything but average, Charlotte. You can achieve anything you put your mind to. All it takes is setting a goal and being resilient enough to discipline yourself into doing all that it takes to reach that goal.”

I smile gratefully. He smirks back, his eyes slowly drifting down from my own to somewhere different. My mouth. I bite the inside of my lip, trying to contain the urge to turtle up.

The pulse between my thighs beckons to me, calling me to touch it, feel it, delve into the wetness of it. Heat sears my cheeks, forcing me to look away in case he can tell what’s happening.

He chuckles, releasing his knuckle from my chin and pushes off the car, standing up while keeping his hands on the car door through the open window.

“My parents always preached that anecdote to me, and I believe that’s one of the reasons I’ve been so successful here. Even though they were a little harsher than most, it taught me that if I want something, I can get it if I work hard enough. It’s all about mastering your mind and body.”

He pauses and peers up at the sky. “Sorry to get all life coachy,” he says, looking back at me as he rubs the back of his neck. “If you ever want any tips on motivation or finding what you want to do, let me know. I’d be more than happy to help you.”

Why’s he so eager to help me? Does he really mean it?

 “Thanks for the coaching moment and offer, Jared. I may just take you up on that sometime, but I gotta get home. I’ll catch ya tomorrow.”

A deep rumble drowns out the last of my sentence, pulling my attention to the road.

NO FREAKING WAY.

Ecstasy is tied to that man and his bike. I could spot him anywhere. It’s the biker boy! Holy shit! Does he live around here then?

Everything else in the world turns black as my sights pull him in. He slows down as he nears the school parking lot and in slow motion glances my way. My breathing grows faster, and I squeeze my thighs together, my body now trained to expect pleasure when he’s around. If only that dark visor lifted up for a moment, giving me something to confirm he’s real and I’m not hallucinating right now. But just like that, the motorcycle growls as he speeds off past the entrance and doesn’t look back.

“Charlotte? Charlotte…”

“Huh?” The rest of the world’s sounds return.

“You alright? You looked like you saw a celebrity or something. Did you know that guy?” He hooks his thumb over his shoulder where my fantasy just vanished from.

“Uh, no. Sorry. Just zoned out for a sec. Sorry,” I chuckle awkwardly as I grapple with my reality.

No way did I just see my secret obsession in real life. No freaking way.

“No worries. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? Drive safe.”

And with that he turns and runs toward the track, ripping his shirt off in the process. I stare at him through my rear-view mirror, mesmerized by the muscles in his back moving in tune with those powerful legs of his. He’s not even in track shorts yet, why’d he take his shirt off? Did he remove his shirt for me?

I need to get out of here…

----------------------------------------------------

My parents are home, but I want it so badly, I’m willing to chance getting caught again. To make sure they can’t notice anything, I check the back of my dress in the side-view mirror of my car to make sure I haven’t soaked through it from how wet I am. The cloth looks dry, thank goodness. I chose not to wear underwear today for easy access in case I found time and felt up to pleasuring myself. Turns out, not wearing underwear is comfortable. Sounds like the commando way might be the way to go moving forward.

Their keyboard clacks echo from the dining room as they both furiously type away on their laptops. They must have a tight deadline to hit. Typically, when I find them in this condition it’s a bad idea to disturb them. So instead of saying hi, I give each of them a small side hug with a squeeze that’s returned with a small pat on my arm as acknowledgment.

Excitement builds as I dart up the stairs. This is perfect. There’s no way they’ll walk in on me with how engrossed they are in work right now.

Discarding my phone on the bed, I sit in my chair, excitedly opening my laptop at last. The biker boy’s page on Xypher is still pulled up from last time. Oops. I completely forgot to close it out. I hope dad never came up here to snoop.

That thought almost sways me to not do what I’m about to do, but then I glance at all the videos again and decide, screw it. I quickly lock the door, making sure to keep the lights on this time so it doesn’t seem suspicious.

Satisfied I’m safe, I gravitate toward the video of his arm and hand again. Veins clearly bulge out on his forearm and the back of his hand when he flexes. As he keeps his fist in a ball to show his strength, it makes me wonder how all that strength would feel inside me.

My fingers slide under my dress, ruffling up the lower half and letting it rest on my upper thighs. Two fingers trace along the inside of my thigh as I imagine they’re his teasing me and grazing against my skin but not entering right away.

My chest rises and falls faster with each touch. I rest my head along the back of the chair and close my eyes, fully allowing myself to dive into the fantasy. He heavily pants underneath his helmet beside me, eager for his turn to touch me.

I’m dripping onto the chair under me in unbearable anticipation, aching and breathless from the wait. Unable to take it anymore, I thrust two fingers deep inside myself in one quick motion, cupping my hand to my mouth to prevent the loud sound that escapes from giving me away. My back arches and my neck strains against the back of the chair from pleasurable tension.

It feels so good. So fucking good. I rarely swear, but it feels so right to say in this situation. I can’t believe how naturally swearing comes under these conditions, but fuck. There are no other words capable of matching the pleasure filling my body at my touch.

My nails almost tear into the skin on my face, my palm clasping over my mouth so hard, I’m almost suffocating myself to keep silent. My other palm glues down flat to get a harder grip into myself. Two fingers don’t feel enough anymore so I move a third finger in, squeezing tightly beside the other two. I release my other hand from my mouth, lurching forward to get deeper, biting my lip hard to keep from crying out, barely feeling the pain amidst the pleasure.

My dress straps fall down my shoulders, exposing my breast that’s now being coddled by my hand. I grind in rough circular motions to explore every part I can, panting and gripping my left breast hard, tensing more and more with each movement. Pressure builds in my core and my muscles tense. I’m getting close.

How? How does this feel even better than the other night? My heavy eyelids lull open, my eyes rolling back from pleasure as my toes grip the carpet. My body tenses up, harder and harder until I can barely get a breath in. Stars fill my vision as euphoric release hits me, and its pulsing grip sucks on my fingers. Whispered moans escape as I writhe against myself through blissful completion.

That felt so fucking good. My God.

I sit forward and wipe my fingers on my dress, disheveled and breathing heavy, trying to get my bearings back.

A small amount of shame resurfaces but I shove it down hard, instead letting myself revel in the ecstasy I brought myself. Ben’s right. I’m an adult. I’m allowed to make my own choices and keep secrets about myself. It’s harmless pleasure. I’m not doing anything wrong at all.

After exiting Xypher and erasing my browser history for good measure, I go to stand up but freeze at the rev of an engine.

Is that Ben? Is our fight finally over?

Rushing to the window, I fumble with my dress strings, pulling them back onto my shoulders to make sure I’m covered. But it’s not Ben. It’s him.

My heart races, a sudden coldness hitting my core, replacing the previous warmth that was just there. He’s staring down at his phone. Mouth parted, I watch in shock as he sits on his bike in idle like he belongs here. Like he’s just pulled up to home and hasn’t a care in the world. What’s he doing? Does he know I live here?

His gloved thumb taps the screen at the same time my phone dings.

What the…

His helmet snaps toward my window.

Oh shit!

Like a heavy sandbag, my body drops to the floor, taking the breath out of me from the impact. Ouch. My chest and knees took the full brunt of the hit on the hardwood, leaving a residual sting in my nipples and bones.

R.I.P, my boobs.

Why did my phone go off at the same time he tapped his? There’s no way…

Staying on the ground, my elbows scrape against my floor as I army crawl to my bed and pat around for my phone.

Gotcha!

The bright screen makes me squint, but the thudding in my chest only increases at what I see.

Unknown: You're so beautiful when you touch yourself, Charlotte.

The unknown text has no number attached to it no matter how many times I click the name. No freakin’ way is the man I just masturbated to texting me that. Are you kidding me? Panic ensues with racing questions as his motorcycle still idles outside my house like it’s waiting for my next move.

He saw me? How the hell could he watch me masturbate to him? How many times has he watched before… And why is it so hot to imagine him secretly watching me get off?

A dull warm throb returns as my breathing increases. Would he come upstairs if I invited him in right now? My arms twitch from the power of my pounding heart as I text him:

I don't know how you got my number...but are you BikerBB64? And if you are him and sitting outside my house right now...did you want to come in?

I can’t believe I just sent that! Who am I?

Probably not a smart thing to do in case this dude is a serial killer, but my curiosity is getting the better of me. Plus, I don’t care if he reveals himself to me or not. He can keep his anonymity. It’s not like he needs to take the helmet off to play with me…

 My toes curl, and I bite down on a mischievous grin.

A minute passes and I have no idea if he’s reading it or what’s going on. So, daring a peek, I get on my knees and look over the windowsill. The bright light of his phone shines in the reflection off his visor. Both of my lips curl under my teeth and my fingertips drum on the wooden windowsill as I anxiously await his next move.

But instead of getting to live out my fantasy, he shoves his phone in his side pouch after obviously reading my message and speeds off, leaving me empty, wet and alone.

Did I do something wrong?

The rejection stings, setting my ribs tight and bringing about that familiar dull ache in my chest. With now two boys under my belt ignoring me, one who apparently has decided to stalk me, I swallow the lob in my throat and sulk into the bathroom to shower off the leftover pleasure coating my leg along with the cold emptiness settling into my soul.  

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Getting ready for school the next day is bittersweet. Fighting the self-consciousness from being rejected by my latest obsession, I wear the next dress in my closet, a long pale blue sundress flowing down to my mid-calf and bunched up in the middle, pushing up and accentuating my breasts. I pull the middle strings tight, tying them to allow the tops of my breasts to pop up more. My eyes linger on them in the mirror. They seem bigger. Is it from my newfound explorations?

 I bought this dress years ago for a Renaissance fair but never had the courage to wear it. Instead, I wore leather pants and a long white shirt. Safe, unnoticeable and comfortable just like me most of my life.

But this last week has been different…I’ve felt empowered for the first time ever and not just from the attention I’ve gotten from Jared but from the extra attention I’ve given myself. The ghost of a smile paints my lips. Yeah, who cares if Ben nor the biker boy want me.

My breasts bounce when I fling my backpack on, filling me with an overflowing lightness. Yeah, I’m freakin’ hot. I don’t need them. Like a string pulls my shoulders back and chest out, self-confidence returns with a vengeance.

I wish I’d found this confidence in myself sooner. My high school experience might’ve been much different than the low-key, isolated one I chose. I’ll just have to make college a different experience. One full of fun memories, life lived and new experiences.

I smile at the prospect as I park in the school parking lot. I have a feeling my life is about to get vastly better, and I’m excited for it.

When walking through the school hallway, more than a few heads turn my way, making me blush and causing me to return the attention with a painful smile.

When I got dressed this morning, I noticed my lower lip had slight bruising and swelling on it from how strong I had bitten it to keep quiet last night. I hope that isn’t the reason heads are turning to stare at me and it’s just the fact I look good in the dress. I tried to dig up whatever old makeup I had laying around to cover it so they shouldn’t be able to tell, but I’m still paranoid. If anyone asks what happened, I’ll probably freeze and stumble over my words.

What would I tell them? Oh yeah, my lip’s bruised because I masturbated so hard last night, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut and almost screamed out into the house alerting my parents to my sexual activities. That’d go over well.

I’m adjusting my backpack in my usual seat in first period when Ben walks in. He takes one look at me and blushes a deep shade of red.

Ben actually blushed?

My cheeks burn to match his. His eyes lower and widen for a split second, a second that wouldn’t have been noticeable if I didn’t know him so well, before he meets my gaze and quickly looks away. An ever so subtle lip curl twitches at the edge of his mouth as if he’s trying to hide a smile. I mirror him with a smirk of my own, hoping to break the ice, but unfortunately, he still moves to the other side of the classroom away from me.

I slouch, deflated from the small hope I held for a second and rotate back to my computer. Why’s he not sitting next to me? I thought his initial flicker of a smile meant he wasn’t mad at me anymore, so why the distance? Does he hate me now? Maybe he’s back with Tree, I think sadly, leaning my cheek on my left hand that’s propped up by my elbow off the wooden desk by the keyboard.

“Alright class, I know it’s the last day, but I still want to see the resumes I’ve asked you to type up. Go ahead and open them on your computers. I’ll go around in alphabetical order and review. If you have any questions, feel free to write them down so we can discuss them when I get to you. Otherwise, you may talk, quietly.”

Mrs. Coxe is the best. I’m going to miss her. She always makes sure we keep to our rules but with some amount of freedom. I can only hope I find some professors at college that make me feel as comfortable as she does.

I lazily click open my resume and leave it on the screen to wait my turn. This is so pointless to do without any work experience. It’s like, here you go. I went to school and now I’m totally unprepared to do the job I’m interviewing for…hire me. But maybe that’s just the cynic in me.

I peer at Ben discreetly to see if he’s looking at me too.

Sigh.

He’s not. He’s caught up in a conversation with Greta who once again sits right next to him.

What a good guy. As much as she annoys him and as much as he teases about running away from her, he always entertains her with kind conversation. I’ve always loved that about him.

Oops, I stared too long. Ben locks eyes with me, his lips curving into a mischievous smile before turning away again.

Embarrassed, I turn back to my computer, placing my cool palms on my cheeks to calm down.

I wonder where we’ll both end up in life. Will this be the end of our close friendship? I can’t imagine we’ll stop being friends altogether, but maybe our best friend phase has run its course. A twisted tug of sadness hits me in my core from that reality along with nostalgia for the times we may not get again.

His family’s farm has always been one of my favorite places to escape to when I’ve felt overwhelmed with life. If I could describe heaven, it would be there, helping in the field or with the livestock. Sometimes when Ben isn’t around, I’ll hang out with his father in the shop while he fixes machinery. Even just sitting here now, I can smell the exhaust from the tractors or the fresh cut hay in the field after him and his father have mowed it down and raked it. Mmm…my own personal euphoria.

I used to run over to his house on the weekends before Tree existed. When he’d come meet me straight out of the field, God, he’d smell so good, like fresh dirt and sweat. Whenever I hugged him, especially on those days, it was hard to let go. My body would completely relax like he was my own personal therapy human.

Not to mention, his parents are practically my second family. I’ve been to plenty of family dinners, holidays, family game nights and even a few vacations with them.

Although now that I think about it, my parents never returned the favor. Ben’s rarely been invited over to my house as part of the family or treated as such. I never realized that before. I wonder why that is.

My parents on the surface seem to like Ben a lot. Maybe before the summer is over, I’ll ask if my parents are okay with inviting him over a few times for game nights and including him as part of the family so we can have those last memories to share together before the good times inevitably end.

“Okay, Charlotte, let’s see what you got,” Mrs. Coxe says from behind me.

“Huh? Oh, sure.”

I scoot my chair back and give her a full view of the screen before fading back into my daydreams.

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Jared leans on the classroom door, hands fully in his pockets as he waits for me after class. 

“Beautiful dress today, Charlotte,” he says putting his arm around me per our new routine. “I’m sad that after today I won’t get my daily dose of you in your dresses. We’ll have to make sure we meet up over the summer, so I can get my fix,” he jokingly says with a wink.

At least, I think he’s joking. He needs a daily dose of me in dresses? He wants to hang out during the summer? A hot burn tingles my face at the implication.

I walk with him to my next class, not bothering to check for Ben. I’ll let things flow and fix themselves naturally between us. Plus, I’m sure approaching him while Jared has his arm around me won’t improve the situation. I make a mental note to ask him why he hates Jared so much one of these days. He’s a nice guy. Plus, all the other girls are friends with him. If he was a bad guy, he wouldn’t be so well liked, right?

Jared leaves me at my next class with a tight side hug which I reciprocate with a head on his shoulder and a wave goodbye. No other teachers bother to teach anything of substance to us seniors, so I’m able to spend the rest of my day zoning out about Ben, Jared and my new anonymous stalker.

Does he go to my school? Is he even in school? I can’t tell his age at all by his posts, but regardless of his age he seems…experienced. Is his face as hot as his body? If I text him again, will he respond? I shake my head at the ridiculousness of the idea. No. I invited him in and he stiffed me. He doesn’t deserve my attention right now.

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Everyone else in class bonds over their excitement for all the graduation parties this weekend and what events are being held at each one. I don’t have any others to attend besides Jared’s and Ben’s this weekend. I’m surprisingly excited about going to both.

Look at me being a social butterfly.

I’m determined to be more outgoing at both parties and have a social summer. Currently, I’m more excited for Jared’s party at this point because it doesn’t involve worrying about how Ben will react or might be feeling since he won’t be there. I’ll be totally free to enjoy myself for once. And if the biker boy wants to see me, he apparently knows where I live so he can come get me if he wants to that badly.

Hmph.

Someone grabs me from behind and pulls me into a hug.

“Hey girl! I cannot believe it’s our last day. We’re like officially adults now!” Shirley walks around in front of me with a sidelong smirk. “Also, I have a few questions for you.”

My stomach jumps in anxious anticipation of what questions she could possibly have. She practically falls into the chair next to me.

“Okay, so first off have you seen the biker boy’s post I sent you yet? His videos are sooo fuckin’ hot. If you don’t check them out, you will regret it. And look, I know you don’t want to create a Xypher account, but it doesn’t cause any harm to do it. Plus, if you create one, then you can follow me, and I can send you all the hot guys I follow. It’ll be how we bond over the summer and keep in touch,” she exclaims with a giggle.

If there was such a thing as being a lush for men, she was it. I curl my lips in at the comment to fight a grin, knowing I have to lie. If I’m honest about creating an account and stalking his profile, then for some reason I feel like she’ll know what I did…know that I pleasured myself to that profile multiple times, am starting to have an unhealthy obsession with him and that he’s reached out to me. I don’t want to share that part of me with her, nor anyone.

“How about this. How about you help me create an account sometime this summer so we can be connected through Xypher once we both go off to college?”

She lights up at the idea. Good, she bought it.

“Perfect! Text me, and we’ll get together and create one and explore all my favorite profiles. Who knows, maybe we’ll find the perfect guy for us on there.” She stares up at the ceiling dreamily.

I smile at the dopey expression. Yup. Such a lush.

“Great,” I chuckle.

“So… are you dating Jared?” she asks in a hushed tone, leaning towards me.

In the middle of bending down to grab my notebook, I almost lurch out of my seat in shock. Dating? Me? Jared?

“What makes you say that?” I say cooly, hoping she didn’t notice my actual hidden reaction.

“Oh, you can’t hide it from me, Charlie. I know the only reason you’ve been wearing dresses all week is to catch his attention. Plus, his arm’s always around you in the hallway and to be honest, it looks like you enjoy it.”

Oh…I didn’t think about everyone being able to see how Jared and I were acting. I’ve been in my own world, oblivious to the people around us. The only person’s reaction I ever thought about was Ben’s. Self-consciousness creeps back into my gut. What have people been saying about me behind my back?

“Well first off, I didn’t start wearing dresses for him nor anybody for that matter.”

Lies.

“And Jared sorta just started waiting for me after my classes and acting like that on his own. I mean, he’s cool and all, but I’m pretty sure we’re just friends.”

“Mmm. I see,” she says like she doesn’t believe me in the slightest. I hadn’t bothered to put the time in to delve into what’s happening between Jared and me. Maybe it’s worth investigating… I am single after all, and he does seem interested.

“Well, regardless of what’s actually happening, it’s pretty obvious he likes you. Do you like him back?”

“What’s with the third degree, Shirl?” I snap with a bite in my tone. Being interrogated about my personal life is not something I’m up for with her nor anyone else right now.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to hit a trigger. I was only curious. Jared’s never dated any girls at our school, so I find it interesting is all.”

I nervously play with the drawstrings on the bosom of my dress, contemplating what to say.

“No,” I pause. “We’re not dating. Honestly, I have no idea what’s going on. As far as I’m aware, we’re just friends, even though we have gotten closer this week…”

“Girrrrl. No one is interested in being just friends when they act like that. Especially when they walk you to your car every day and are all over you all the time. I mean, you have noticed how he looks at you, haven’t you?”

Yes, but not really? There’s a small bit of intensity to it, but it’s not like it’s all the time.

Sigh.

Being out of touch with my emotions is getting really inconvenient. I shouldn’t be this oblivious to everything everyone else can see, especially when it makes me sit here clueless.

“I mean, I have noticed he’s looked at me… differently, but I don’t know. Nothing’s happened.”

“All I know is that if Jared was looking at me like that, I’d be all over him. You should be flattered. Like I said, he’s never chosen any girls here to go out with. You’re the first.”

“Chosen? Are there literally girls lining up to date him or something?”

“Yes! How’ve you never noticed?”

Well, because I only paid attention to the girls who always went after Ben, which always seemed to be a lot. I forgot about other guys who might be tagged as desirable, yet unreachable.

“I don’t know. I’ve uh, never been in this situation before, I guess.”

Shirley rolls her eyes.

“Always so innocent, Charlotte.” She chuckles trying to play it off, but I swear it sounded snarky like she was annoyed.

“Was that supposed to be a dig at me?” I retort, not caring if she registers my snark back. The comment she made is rude and meant to hurt me on purpose.

Her eyes narrow for a second, flashing her true feelings. Then it hits me.

“Do you like Jared? Is that what this is about? Are you jealous?”

She scoffs, defensively crossing her arms and stands. “No. I was just curious to find out if the rumors of you two dating were true, but I didn’t expect you to be so oblivious about it.”

“Listen Shirl, I don’t care if I date him or not. I can put in a good word for you if you want? I don’t want any drama or to have you be mad at me for no good reason. Like I said, I didn’t even think much about dating him. If he likes me as you say, then I’m sure he’d hear me out if I said I wasn’t interested and hyped you up instead.”

A small twitch of emotion flickers under the surface, her eyes darting to the side slowly as she contemplates my offer. She finally meets my gaze with a smile.

“Really?” she mutters quietly, relaxing her body and sitting back down.

“Absolutely, Shirl.” I mean it too.

I place a comforting hand on her shoulder to prove I’m not a threat. Jared’s affections don’t mean that much. Sure, it’s been fun the last week, but since Shirley’s always liked him a lot, then I don’t care to step aside. If I never talk to Jared after his graduation party, that’d be fine with me.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before? I could’ve put in a word for you sooner or at least stopped the behavior if it was making you uncomfortable.”

I know I don’t owe her anything, but I hate needless drama. Especially over stupid things like boys.

Especially boys who act weird, never say what they mean or throw fits. Or boys who secretly send you a flirty message and then drive off, never to be heard from again.

Tsk. Freakin’ babies. All these boys are babies.

Her eyes soften. “Thanks, Charlotte. I know we haven’t been the closest of friends, but to know you care about my feelings means a lot.”

“So, what do you want me to say to him? Have you guys ever really talked before or flirted you think? You’re going to have to tell me exactly what you want me to say because I’m new to all this stuff.”

She brightens with excitement at the prospect. “You’re the best! I really did not expect you to be this cool about it.”

I nod in appreciation, sitting back and waiting for her to tell me what she wants me to say.

“Okay, first ask him if he likes anyone on the track team. Then when he starts talking, say you have a good friend who would be perfect for him and talk me up. Like tell him that I love running, obviously, that I plan to run in college, and that you think I’m hilarious and cool to hang out with.”

Her plan doesn’t sound very convincing. I’ll have to come up with something before I talk to him. She’s cool and all, but I don’t know much about her that qualifies as a wow factor. I’m sure I can sway it to make it sound like he has to check her out if she’s right about how he feels about me. If anything, the effort’s worth it.

Maybe this will bring Shirley and I closer, dare I even say something resembling best friends? It’d be nice to have a girlfriend around, especially if things don’t resolve between Ben and me. A painful twang punches my stomach at the idea of Ben leaving my life.

The low-pitched bell rings, indicating the end of the day is here and high school’s officially over.

Shirley gives me a big hug and leaves the classroom. She bashfully smiles at Jared who barely glances at her before motioning to me to get under his arm like I was wrong for not being there already. Another twang stirs in my stomach; except this time, I’m not sure what causes it. I smirk, ignoring the sensation and snuggle in under him.

He smells even better than this morning. Did he put more cologne on before coming to get me? Is that normal for friends?

I shake the notion off, instead focusing on how to bring up the conversation about Shirley to him. Too in my head, I don’t realize we aren’t speaking until we get to my car, and he asks what’s wrong.

“Huh?” I say, pulling out of my concentration. This would be a good time to bring up Shirley, but I haven’t thought of exactly what to say yet. Guess I’ll just wing it.

“I said are you okay?” he says with an amused chuckle, removing his arm around me and standing in front of me as I lean against my car door.

“Oh yeah. I was just thinking—"

“Thinking about what?” he asks curiously, leaning closer to me, cutting me off mid-sentence.

“Well, I’d tell you if you let me finish,” I sass back with a smirk.

He rests his palm on the car door next to my left shoulder, half sealing me to my spot. My stomach flips from being this close, the suggested intimacy way more than what we’ve been doing thus far.

I clear my throat, trying to get rid of any noticeable anxiousness in my voice and redirect the vibes coming off him.

“I was thinking of something I wanted to ask you.”

His face lights up. “I love questions. Give it to me.”

“I was wondering if you liked any of the girls on the track team because I know of a great girl for you.” Shoot, that was rushed.

He pulls his arm away from me, studying me like he’s unsure about my question. Why’s he taking so long to answer a simple question? The awkward silence is killing me.

“Because Shirley is great for you, you know,” I blurt out, unable to stand the silence or his intense analytical stare any longer.

Crap. I blew it.

That wasn’t convincing in any way. I didn’t give him any of her strengths or make her sound unique at all.

“Is that so?” he asks, putting his hands in his back jean pockets, watching me intently like I’m an equation he can’t figure out.

“Mhmm. She loves video games and running, obviously…” She’s going to hate me. I am blowing this so hard.

“She’s cute, yeah. I’ve noticed her before. I haven’t thought of her that way though, if I’m being honest.”

“Well, you should check that out.” Kill me. Just kill me. I am so awkward.

He smirks slyly at my obvious awkwardness.

“Don’t laugh at me,” I giggle, pushing him playfully in the chest.

“I can laugh at you if I want, Charlie,” he says, teetering back and forth on his toes. He moves next to me again and leans on the car door. Ben walks right in front of us, distracting me from the conversation Jared tries to continue.

He doesn’t bother glancing in my direction. I barely catch sight of his eyes before he’s fitting his motorcycle helmet over his head and hopping on his bike. My chest tightens. I miss him so much.

“Why are you always staring at Ben?”

“Huh?” I say, caught off guard from the question.

“Why are you always staring at Ben?” he asks again rather sternly, bouncing a deep stare back and forth into each one of my eyes.

“I am not always staring at him. I may have been glancing at him more recently but only because we haven’t been as close lately. We fought over something stupid and have barely talked since. I’m just trying to figure out what’s going on. Fights like that aren’t worth losing friends over, in my opinion, so I’m trying to figure out how to navigate it is all.” I look down at my feet, now feeling uncomfortable with the conversation.  

“Ah. I see.”

Studying him, I notice his gaze lingers anywhere but me, and his pained expression of tight lips and furrowed brows worries me.  

“Are you okay?” I touch his arm to comfort him.

His shoulders loosen at my touch, and his face softens. He puts his arm around me again, allowing me to lean into him where I wrap myself up in his fresh woody and citrus scent. His cologne makes me want to lay on the beach by a campfire at night. It’s relaxing but also makes me want to be adventurous, to try new things and hang with friends around a fire on a cool summer evening.

“You’re a hard one to figure out, you know.”

I tilt my head up at him, furrowing my brow at the accusation. “What do you mean?”

I pull out of his embrace and put my bookbag in the backseat. When I turn around, I notice the parking lot’s almost empty. Everyone must’ve booked it out of here now that school’s officially over. “Wow, everyone’s gone already.”

“I didn’t notice.”

Now I’d almost rather him look away. His intense stare into my soul is staggering. I turn away, unable to bear it and shift on my feet, trying to think of how to escape his gaze.

“Well, hey. I’m gonna get going. You should definitely talk to Shirley though. If you want, I can write down her number for you?”

“That’s okay,” he says shortly. His face softens quickly at his next words. “My graduation party starts at five tomorrow. You’re coming for sure, right?”

“Yes. I wouldn’t be telling you I was coming all week and then not show up. Geez, I’m not that bad of a flake.”

He brightens from satisfaction at my answer. “Good.”

He opens my car door as I tuck my dress underneath me and slide into the driver’s seat. He folds his arms on the open window of my car door, resting his chin on them with a soft smile.

“I’m glad we’ve gotten closer this week. I’m only sad that we didn’t get closer sooner before school ended.” A twinge of regret resounds in his voice.

“We can still stay close friends and chat over the summer. Don’t worry about it. We won’t lose touch.”

He pauses, his expression unreadable. He leans his cheek onto one hand while raising the other and grazes my cheek with his knuckle. His skin’s surprisingly soft as silk, moving against my skin with little friction. My breath hitches, and a heat simmers between my legs at his gentle touch.

“I don’t want to be just friends with you, Charlie.” He slowly moves his hand under my chin and pinches it before removing it from my face. Then without so much as a change in expression, walks off to his car. Dumbfounded, I stay frozen in my car, my mouth gaping open in shock at his confession.

Well, I guess Shirley was right. He does indeed like me. Now what do I do?